I rarely get super personal here. But I’ve got the blues, y’all. The blues. And I’ve got it bad in a serious way. Like, hearing Sarah McLachlan singing The Rainbow Connection on the overhead play at a Starbucks just might make me cry while I’m waiting in line. See? BAD. But it’s with good reason. You all know I’m married, but you may not know that my love goes to Chicago for grad school every summer for six weeks.
The Great Divide started today.
Last summer was the first of the three summers. I was stuck here in LA because I was doing a play, and this year is no different. This summer, I’m working on an independent short film I will play the lead in, and that I also have a hand in developing. I’m stuck again – grounded, as it were.
I don’t take any part of this relationship for granted, but as soon as we get to this point in June it somehow feels like I do. At the absolute least, I sure have gotten used to sharing the bed.
But six weeks is nothing, you say. Before you know it, it’ll be over – right? Well I can explain this. This is our fourteenth year together and our fourth year married. We even lived in different cities for five years. And four years ago, when we finally were able to be in the same place again, we felt this was it.
Now don’t get me wrong – the two of us both know the score, and the roles could be reversed at any moment. Actors leave to go on location all the time. I’ve been on tour, and have worked out of town. Hell – I just spent a week on location in Santa Barbara in April and even that was somewhat difficult, yet I am STILL grateful for that experience. Yes, I know these are the lives and careers we’ve chosen. But that doesn’t make it any easier.
A few days ago, Shoshana Bean posted a video of herself rehearsing a song she was to sing the next day at a small venue here in LA. Her show was called “Today I Sing The Blues.” The two-minute video was amazing. As a singer, there’s not a lot more I respect more than someone who can sing the blues. As a listener, it hurt; I’ve got the blues. I wanted to see her show – it was cheap, and just down the street and I knew she would blow my socks off. But I just couldn’t. I didn’t want to go and cry throughout her entire set. That just ain’t right, you know?
As it got closer to showtime, I watched her video again. And again. And again. I thought about taking my love with me. But I chose not to. I was sure what would happen. But as I watched/listened to her video on repeat, I did find a sort of solace.
Yes, having The Blues hurts. But the way Ms. Shoshana Bean was singing that song… She understood. She knows.
And hearing her sing that song provided me with relief.
Then somehow I was reminded how lucky I am to have found anyone at all. And it could be worse – I could be lonely, yet, that’s not what I feel.
I'm just going to miss all that light.
I’m reminded of Romeo and Juliet, who both met untimely ends. BUT – they found each other. And THAT is reason enough to rejoice.
I wouldn’t feel all of this if I weren’t in LOVE.
REJOICE.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Sunday, June 13, 2010
PRIDE.
As a black American citizen who has benefited from all the hard work people accomplished in the Civil Rights Movement in the 1960s, I have a vested interest in American ideals, our citizens’ rights and most of all; Equality.
If not for the Civil Rights Movement I would not be able to vote.
If not for the Civil Rights Movement, I would not have the education I have.
If not for the Civil Rights Movement, I would not be married to a person from another race.
And the list goes on.
This mindset is where I come from when I think about the issue of Gay Rights.
I have lived in New York, Los Angeles and even kind of lived in San Francisco for a minute [full disclosure, I was in SF about two weeks out of every month for quite a long while] – and because of that, I always think about Gay Pride at this time of year. I’ve been thinking about it a lot in the last couple of years because of Prop 8, and the way the Gay community responded nonviolently. Martin Luther King, Jr. made the contributions he did because nonviolent change was the cornerstone of his message.
What I’ve been thinking about today centers around two things regarding the Pride celebration. What does walking around in your underwear have to do with Pride? And this completely wild behavior – what does it advocate?
In case you don’t know, haven’t heard about it or seen it for yourself, people at Pride celebrations go Ca-razy. Sex, drugs, rock ‘n roll. And then they do it all over again. And then they do it again, for real. I mean, c’mon – the first one was just a rehearsal, right? People always mention that the way gay people act during Pride is exactly the way heterosexual America thinks gay people act every day of the year. C’mon son, now we know that’s not true! We all know there are too many gay people in this world for us to have a functioning society if that were the case.
But it does make me wonder, why should gay people have to be on their “Best Behaviour” during Pride? For some reason, I’m reminded of black people telling other black people not to eat watermelon in public. No one tells people to behave themselves at Mardi Gras, or Carnivale, right?! Why not? Because everyone accepts that those are isolated events where people act that way, they don’t assume those people are like that all year long. I’m all for telling everyone to be safe, and that is important. But telling people to “watch themselves” just seems to be the opposite of what it means to be “proud.”
Gay people still feel oppressed and clearly feel a need to LET GO. And for people who grew up feeling like a freak, being with 100,000 people who are similar to themselves is reason enough to throw down! But that’s just my observation, combined with my opinions of events of the past. I mean back in the day, black people were definitely told to “act right,” because we were proving that we belonged in society – that’s also why we were nonviolent. But gay people being “flamboyant” is not only nonviolent, it’s downright loving.
The first time I ever saw a Gay Pride Parade, I was on vacation with my family in Montreal when I was 14. Now, I’ll admit – that parade was a lot to take for a 14 year-old from the South. And the men walking around in public in tiny underwear thing was especially strange to me. Most of all, it was intimidating. We were trying to get back to our hotel, and everywhere we turned there were hundreds of people; topless women in leather, men in their underwear and they were all chanting “We’re Here! We’re Queer! Get used to it!” It was a lot to handle. By the time I moved to New York City, I had gotten used to the progressive dress code and simply accepted it.
Many gay people continually talk about the underwear thing with disdain. I always forget that even if these people are gay and moved to New York City by the time they were twenty years old, it’s very different from anyone seeing it as a student in Junior High School. I was young enough for that to be part of my childhood, but once you’re twenty – you’ve already solidified some ideas and ideals.
First of all, and to be fair, we have to talk about the phenomenon of people turning themselves into sex objects. Most of the year, people work their jobs, go to the gym, see movies, visit their family and go on vacation. And then when Pride comes along: RELEASE! I think these gay people not only want to feel attractive and sexy, but they also have a healthy need for that attention, love and expression of sexuality as well.
And there’s nothing wrong with that.
Being a sex object it so looked down upon in our society, that most wouldn’t dare do it without an excuse. Just like Halloween – that is the reason every costume you see is either the slutty or sexy version of a costume idea. And why is there nothing wrong with that? Because: people who need that release don’t allow themselves that freedom in their everyday lives. And everyone, no matter who they are, deserves Freedom.
I’m reminded of a conversation I recently had with a female friend. She was understandably frustrated with the idea that there is no word in our society for a male slut. Slut is a word used to describe a promiscuous woman, and the sexism of it all rightly pissed her off. I told her that we do have a word for a male slut. We call male sluts “Men!” She laughed so hard she spit out her coffee. Really.
But back to the main event [and I think this is the heart of the entire matter]. So many gay people grew up feeling like a freak even before they knew anything about their sexuality. And once they got an inkling that they may be homosexual, their feelings of oppression were multiplied and were confirmed by society. We all know Gay people are oppressed, that’s a fact not an opinion. So when these people, who have felt like an outcast their entire time on this planet, finally liberate themselves – they feel AMAZING. Free. Complete.
And after spending your life in the dark, once you’ve finally given yourself light… You finally feel so proud that walking around in your underwear is an expression of your FREEDOM. You can’t truly oppress a soul that’s liberated itself.
That’s PRIDE.
[©MMX MD TOTAL all rights reserved.]
If not for the Civil Rights Movement I would not be able to vote.
If not for the Civil Rights Movement, I would not have the education I have.
If not for the Civil Rights Movement, I would not be married to a person from another race.
And the list goes on.
This mindset is where I come from when I think about the issue of Gay Rights.
I have lived in New York, Los Angeles and even kind of lived in San Francisco for a minute [full disclosure, I was in SF about two weeks out of every month for quite a long while] – and because of that, I always think about Gay Pride at this time of year. I’ve been thinking about it a lot in the last couple of years because of Prop 8, and the way the Gay community responded nonviolently. Martin Luther King, Jr. made the contributions he did because nonviolent change was the cornerstone of his message.
What I’ve been thinking about today centers around two things regarding the Pride celebration. What does walking around in your underwear have to do with Pride? And this completely wild behavior – what does it advocate?
In case you don’t know, haven’t heard about it or seen it for yourself, people at Pride celebrations go Ca-razy. Sex, drugs, rock ‘n roll. And then they do it all over again. And then they do it again, for real. I mean, c’mon – the first one was just a rehearsal, right? People always mention that the way gay people act during Pride is exactly the way heterosexual America thinks gay people act every day of the year. C’mon son, now we know that’s not true! We all know there are too many gay people in this world for us to have a functioning society if that were the case.
But it does make me wonder, why should gay people have to be on their “Best Behaviour” during Pride? For some reason, I’m reminded of black people telling other black people not to eat watermelon in public. No one tells people to behave themselves at Mardi Gras, or Carnivale, right?! Why not? Because everyone accepts that those are isolated events where people act that way, they don’t assume those people are like that all year long. I’m all for telling everyone to be safe, and that is important. But telling people to “watch themselves” just seems to be the opposite of what it means to be “proud.”
Gay people still feel oppressed and clearly feel a need to LET GO. And for people who grew up feeling like a freak, being with 100,000 people who are similar to themselves is reason enough to throw down! But that’s just my observation, combined with my opinions of events of the past. I mean back in the day, black people were definitely told to “act right,” because we were proving that we belonged in society – that’s also why we were nonviolent. But gay people being “flamboyant” is not only nonviolent, it’s downright loving.
The first time I ever saw a Gay Pride Parade, I was on vacation with my family in Montreal when I was 14. Now, I’ll admit – that parade was a lot to take for a 14 year-old from the South. And the men walking around in public in tiny underwear thing was especially strange to me. Most of all, it was intimidating. We were trying to get back to our hotel, and everywhere we turned there were hundreds of people; topless women in leather, men in their underwear and they were all chanting “We’re Here! We’re Queer! Get used to it!” It was a lot to handle. By the time I moved to New York City, I had gotten used to the progressive dress code and simply accepted it.
Many gay people continually talk about the underwear thing with disdain. I always forget that even if these people are gay and moved to New York City by the time they were twenty years old, it’s very different from anyone seeing it as a student in Junior High School. I was young enough for that to be part of my childhood, but once you’re twenty – you’ve already solidified some ideas and ideals.
First of all, and to be fair, we have to talk about the phenomenon of people turning themselves into sex objects. Most of the year, people work their jobs, go to the gym, see movies, visit their family and go on vacation. And then when Pride comes along: RELEASE! I think these gay people not only want to feel attractive and sexy, but they also have a healthy need for that attention, love and expression of sexuality as well.
And there’s nothing wrong with that.
Being a sex object it so looked down upon in our society, that most wouldn’t dare do it without an excuse. Just like Halloween – that is the reason every costume you see is either the slutty or sexy version of a costume idea. And why is there nothing wrong with that? Because: people who need that release don’t allow themselves that freedom in their everyday lives. And everyone, no matter who they are, deserves Freedom.
I’m reminded of a conversation I recently had with a female friend. She was understandably frustrated with the idea that there is no word in our society for a male slut. Slut is a word used to describe a promiscuous woman, and the sexism of it all rightly pissed her off. I told her that we do have a word for a male slut. We call male sluts “Men!” She laughed so hard she spit out her coffee. Really.
But back to the main event [and I think this is the heart of the entire matter]. So many gay people grew up feeling like a freak even before they knew anything about their sexuality. And once they got an inkling that they may be homosexual, their feelings of oppression were multiplied and were confirmed by society. We all know Gay people are oppressed, that’s a fact not an opinion. So when these people, who have felt like an outcast their entire time on this planet, finally liberate themselves – they feel AMAZING. Free. Complete.
And after spending your life in the dark, once you’ve finally given yourself light… You finally feel so proud that walking around in your underwear is an expression of your FREEDOM. You can’t truly oppress a soul that’s liberated itself.
That’s PRIDE.
[©MMX MD TOTAL all rights reserved.]
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Summer in LA
It’s about to be summer in LA! It’s the time of year when you start getting random phone calls from “friends” asking for things. Will you refer me to your agent? Can you call that casting director you know and recommend me for this project? You know who covers Paramount at CAA, right? I know you’re union, but will you perform in my Primetime National Network Commercial for free…? THEN a week later, at a party, you’ll overhear them saying how they can’t believe all you did was talk about yourself on that call. Bitch, after you asked for a favor AGAIN, you asked me how I was!!!
.jpg)
SUMMER IN LA!
Chace Crawford got arrested in Texas for Pot Possession. If he wasn’t already gay, he definitely got ate up by all them horny mens in the clink! Y’all know what I’m talking about: if Chace Crawford wasn’t rockin a beard right now, you’d think that pretty boy was one hot lady.
Apparently the Universe is trying to get me to go to a party at the Playboy Mansion in July, because multiple friends who don’t know each other keep contacting me to get me on the list. The Playboy Mansion. In the middle of summer. Yowza.
Rue McLanahan died and we are all torn up about it. Though the wisdom of Blanche Devereaux will live on forever! In related news, Betty White was seen standing on a mountain, holding a sword as lightning strikes behind her, shouting “THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE!!!”
Christina Aguilera sang a song on the American Idol finale that shows off how mature she is, and what she’s capable of expressing. It was a brilliant performance of a breakup song that was surprisingly not oversung. Most striking was her acting of the song – she came on and created a mood and sang on it. If she did that performance in a Broadway musical, she would win a Tony Award. Really. But just to make sure we know she still got it, she performed this song in a skintight unitard, that was partially see-through! Christina Aguilera: all class, all the time.
Janet Jackson performed on the same American Idol finale while she was in between weaves! She was rocking the same hairdo she had when she played Penny on Good Times [which was the last time I saw her real hair, not that there's anything wrong with that]. Apparently grief does make you brave! “No mama, don’t burn me with that iron!” CLASSIC!
I got a fortune cookie the other day that said “Good Luck!” What the hell kind of fortune is that?! Is my life so ridiculous that even a fortune cookie is telling me I need luck?! DANG, MAMA!
Now that it’s warmer, people are walking their dogs everywhere. When a dog is pooping on a patch of grass, am I the only one that wants to point at the doggie, laugh and say “You have to poop outside! Even YOU look ashamed! You are not dignified! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!” You know you want to. And you'll think about the next time you see a dog "make."
Got some See’s Candies as a gift. Tell me something: How the hell does See’s Candies get away with not giving you a map of what each candy is? ARROGANCE!!! They think their candy is so good that we shouldn’t need to know what it is before we eat it? Well let me be the first to say: Fuck you, See’s Candies! We don't ALL love hazlenut, you motherfuckers!!!
And that, friends, is just the beginning of Summer In LA. Let The Games Begin!
[© MMX MD TOTAL all rights reserved]
.jpg)
SUMMER IN LA!
Chace Crawford got arrested in Texas for Pot Possession. If he wasn’t already gay, he definitely got ate up by all them horny mens in the clink! Y’all know what I’m talking about: if Chace Crawford wasn’t rockin a beard right now, you’d think that pretty boy was one hot lady.
Apparently the Universe is trying to get me to go to a party at the Playboy Mansion in July, because multiple friends who don’t know each other keep contacting me to get me on the list. The Playboy Mansion. In the middle of summer. Yowza.
Rue McLanahan died and we are all torn up about it. Though the wisdom of Blanche Devereaux will live on forever! In related news, Betty White was seen standing on a mountain, holding a sword as lightning strikes behind her, shouting “THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE!!!”
Christina Aguilera sang a song on the American Idol finale that shows off how mature she is, and what she’s capable of expressing. It was a brilliant performance of a breakup song that was surprisingly not oversung. Most striking was her acting of the song – she came on and created a mood and sang on it. If she did that performance in a Broadway musical, she would win a Tony Award. Really. But just to make sure we know she still got it, she performed this song in a skintight unitard, that was partially see-through! Christina Aguilera: all class, all the time.
Janet Jackson performed on the same American Idol finale while she was in between weaves! She was rocking the same hairdo she had when she played Penny on Good Times [which was the last time I saw her real hair, not that there's anything wrong with that]. Apparently grief does make you brave! “No mama, don’t burn me with that iron!” CLASSIC!
I got a fortune cookie the other day that said “Good Luck!” What the hell kind of fortune is that?! Is my life so ridiculous that even a fortune cookie is telling me I need luck?! DANG, MAMA!
Now that it’s warmer, people are walking their dogs everywhere. When a dog is pooping on a patch of grass, am I the only one that wants to point at the doggie, laugh and say “You have to poop outside! Even YOU look ashamed! You are not dignified! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!” You know you want to. And you'll think about the next time you see a dog "make."
Got some See’s Candies as a gift. Tell me something: How the hell does See’s Candies get away with not giving you a map of what each candy is? ARROGANCE!!! They think their candy is so good that we shouldn’t need to know what it is before we eat it? Well let me be the first to say: Fuck you, See’s Candies! We don't ALL love hazlenut, you motherfuckers!!!
And that, friends, is just the beginning of Summer In LA. Let The Games Begin!
[© MMX MD TOTAL all rights reserved]
Friday, May 28, 2010
Bachelor’s Paradise: The Perfect Cosmopolitan
In honor of Sex and the City 2 being released in theaters I present you, dear bachelor [whether single or married] with a recipe from my private bar collection for a Cosmopolitan. Not just any Cosmo – this is not the cheap, overly sweet and sticky concoction served at most bars around the world. This recipe was inspired by the recipe used at the famous Bar 89 in New York City. New York City?! Yes, City. As in “Sex and the City.” After many afternoons with the bartender at Bar 89, I made a suggestion to him about changing the recipe. He laughed in my face. I won’t tell you what was changed [some secrets are kept forever] but I can tell you that after he tasted my version, Bar 89 changed their house recipe to mine. And they were already famous for their Cosmopolitans.
This is The Perfect Cosmopolitan.
But why would you want to make a Cosmopolitan at all, you ask? You can’t stand that drink – and worst of all, it’s PINK! Agreed. But this is no ordinary Cosmo – this drink is magical. You will make this drink for the woman in your life and tell her that it’s in honor of the new Sex and the City movie’s release. You don’t even have to go to the movie with her – most likely she’ll want to go with her girlfriends, if you’re lucky. Make her one of these [or more!] when she gets home and let me tell you… You see, a real Cosmopolitan is not a drink for college co-eds, it's a beverage for grownups. Grown men love this drink, as they should. Because in its heart, this drink is a mean martini. This drink means business.
The Perfect Cosmopolitan will get you laid.
Ingredients:
•A good clean vodka. Absolutely no substitutes. Grey Goose, Belvedere, Chopin or Tanqueray Sterling. Or better. Stoli or Absolut will not suffice.
•Cointreau. Absolutely no substitutes. I’m talking to you, Grand Marnier.
•Fresh lime juice [about 10 limes]. Absolutely no substitutes. Yes, you will juice your own limes.
•Cranberry juice.
What makes this The Perfect Cosmopolitan is not only the proportions, but the quality of the ingredients. The fresh lime starts you on your journey and opens your palate to the clean vodka. Then the subtle orange and cranberry mix together and finish with a refreshing zing. These ingredients make this beverage sublime.
Hardware:
•Cocktail Shaker
•Two-sided Jigger [the one with two different sized measures]
•Ice [big cubes are better, no crushed ice allowed]
Working Quickly:
•Fill a cocktail shaker with ice.
•Fill the larger side of the Jigger with vodka. Pour into shaker.
•Fill the smaller side of the Jigger with Cointreau. Pour into shaker.
•Fill the larger side of the Jigger with fresh lime juice. Pour into shaker.
•Fill the smaller side of the Jigger with Cranberry Juice. Pour into shaker.
Place cap onto shaker and shake like hell. You’ll want to shake until the shaker is very cold in your hands. At least 20 shakes. Strain into a martini glass and serve.
Why a martini glass? Martini glasses force you to take your time and sip. And they give you time to flirt.
Enjoy the rest of your evening. Remember to use birth control if you’re not trying to have children at the moment.
[© MMX MD TOTAL all rights reserved]
This is The Perfect Cosmopolitan.
But why would you want to make a Cosmopolitan at all, you ask? You can’t stand that drink – and worst of all, it’s PINK! Agreed. But this is no ordinary Cosmo – this drink is magical. You will make this drink for the woman in your life and tell her that it’s in honor of the new Sex and the City movie’s release. You don’t even have to go to the movie with her – most likely she’ll want to go with her girlfriends, if you’re lucky. Make her one of these [or more!] when she gets home and let me tell you… You see, a real Cosmopolitan is not a drink for college co-eds, it's a beverage for grownups. Grown men love this drink, as they should. Because in its heart, this drink is a mean martini. This drink means business.
The Perfect Cosmopolitan will get you laid.
Ingredients:
•A good clean vodka. Absolutely no substitutes. Grey Goose, Belvedere, Chopin or Tanqueray Sterling. Or better. Stoli or Absolut will not suffice.
•Cointreau. Absolutely no substitutes. I’m talking to you, Grand Marnier.
•Fresh lime juice [about 10 limes]. Absolutely no substitutes. Yes, you will juice your own limes.
•Cranberry juice.
What makes this The Perfect Cosmopolitan is not only the proportions, but the quality of the ingredients. The fresh lime starts you on your journey and opens your palate to the clean vodka. Then the subtle orange and cranberry mix together and finish with a refreshing zing. These ingredients make this beverage sublime.
Hardware:
•Cocktail Shaker
•Two-sided Jigger [the one with two different sized measures]
•Ice [big cubes are better, no crushed ice allowed]
Working Quickly:
•Fill a cocktail shaker with ice.
•Fill the larger side of the Jigger with vodka. Pour into shaker.
•Fill the smaller side of the Jigger with Cointreau. Pour into shaker.
•Fill the larger side of the Jigger with fresh lime juice. Pour into shaker.
•Fill the smaller side of the Jigger with Cranberry Juice. Pour into shaker.
Place cap onto shaker and shake like hell. You’ll want to shake until the shaker is very cold in your hands. At least 20 shakes. Strain into a martini glass and serve.
Why a martini glass? Martini glasses force you to take your time and sip. And they give you time to flirt.
Enjoy the rest of your evening. Remember to use birth control if you’re not trying to have children at the moment.
[© MMX MD TOTAL all rights reserved]
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Backstage at A Christmas Carol: The Long Run
I’ve done many lengthy runs of different shows, and the experience varies. Some shows are simply more demanding than others. Doing Shakespeare’s A Winter’s Tale eight times a week for weeks on end was difficult physically and emotionally – but ultimately rewarding. Other shows are such a joy that you don’t notice what you’re putting your body through.
Then there are musicals.
It’s been a while since I’ve done a musical. I love them, they are what got me started as an actor but I had forgotten how much more energy it takes to do a musical than it takes to do most plays. This production of A Christmas Carol is not a “let’s all sit on a couch and talk” kind of theatrical experience. I’m singing while dancing ballet! And then it’s offstage to change costumes and run back onstage again. And there’s nothing like it; being able to see the smiles and the tears on the audience’s faces. You can feel how you’re touching the audience - that for those two hours, we’re all in this experience together. Rewarding.
One question I always get is “What’s difficult about doing a long run of a show? Does it get boring?” These questions get straight to the heart of what means to do your job well. The first thing to remember is that every night, this is that audience’s first time seeing the show and it’s our responsibility to put on the best version of our show. That idea still keeps me excited and gives me a fun nervousness before curtain. I also spend a lot of time with the script, even after the show has opened. And I’m not the only one. The amazing Chris Winfield, our Scrooge, can be seen with his script every day. So can Klair Bybee, our Jacob Marley. Clearly we’ve already learned our lines, so what could we be doing, you wonder? We’re still investigating the material. Making discoveries. Looking for new ideas, actions and emotions to discover. I’m sure you’ve read books more than one time and somehow on the tenth reading, you understand something that you’ve never noticed before. It’s the same with the script. Not only does it make your performance clearer and more fully developed, but it keeps you fresh. When you’re still open to finding new things, even while you’re onstage, it is not a repeat performance. It’s the first time for you, and the audience can feel that. How? It’s a mystery.
I can say that being able to refine your performance over the time you are performing a role is a wonderful gift of the theater. I never “freeze” a performance, because that shuts out all possibility of magic. We’ve had people see the show multiple times and tell us how much the show has grown even though they loved it the first time they saw it. That is the best compliment we can get, because it means we’re doing our job well.
As we get to the end of our run of this show, I know I’ll miss doing it. There’s something about this story, getting to hear it every night has an impact on you – as it should. I’ll also miss working with all of these wonderful actors! These are the funniest people I’ve spent time with in recent memory. Since there are 27 of us, we are like one big crazy family backstage, in the dressing rooms and in the green room. We’re constantly looking for a kid’s vest that always seems to wander off. Every day. The kids are always joking with us and playing jokes on us. And it keeps everything interesting and fresh backstage. That camaraderie also informs our relationships in our performances. Everything helps everything.
I’ll see you at the theater! Maybe even this weekend – there are still tickets available for our final four shows! And if you feel so inclined, come on back to say hello to the cast after the show. You’re allowed - we’re all family.
Before I forget – I wanted to remind you that our next production at The Group Rep is The City. It’s a revival of a play that was written in 1909 but has been updated to modern times. It’s a play with murder, intrigue, scandal and politics. Stay tuned to this space to find out more…
[© MMIX MD TOTAL all rights reserved.]
Then there are musicals.
It’s been a while since I’ve done a musical. I love them, they are what got me started as an actor but I had forgotten how much more energy it takes to do a musical than it takes to do most plays. This production of A Christmas Carol is not a “let’s all sit on a couch and talk” kind of theatrical experience. I’m singing while dancing ballet! And then it’s offstage to change costumes and run back onstage again. And there’s nothing like it; being able to see the smiles and the tears on the audience’s faces. You can feel how you’re touching the audience - that for those two hours, we’re all in this experience together. Rewarding.
One question I always get is “What’s difficult about doing a long run of a show? Does it get boring?” These questions get straight to the heart of what means to do your job well. The first thing to remember is that every night, this is that audience’s first time seeing the show and it’s our responsibility to put on the best version of our show. That idea still keeps me excited and gives me a fun nervousness before curtain. I also spend a lot of time with the script, even after the show has opened. And I’m not the only one. The amazing Chris Winfield, our Scrooge, can be seen with his script every day. So can Klair Bybee, our Jacob Marley. Clearly we’ve already learned our lines, so what could we be doing, you wonder? We’re still investigating the material. Making discoveries. Looking for new ideas, actions and emotions to discover. I’m sure you’ve read books more than one time and somehow on the tenth reading, you understand something that you’ve never noticed before. It’s the same with the script. Not only does it make your performance clearer and more fully developed, but it keeps you fresh. When you’re still open to finding new things, even while you’re onstage, it is not a repeat performance. It’s the first time for you, and the audience can feel that. How? It’s a mystery.
I can say that being able to refine your performance over the time you are performing a role is a wonderful gift of the theater. I never “freeze” a performance, because that shuts out all possibility of magic. We’ve had people see the show multiple times and tell us how much the show has grown even though they loved it the first time they saw it. That is the best compliment we can get, because it means we’re doing our job well.
As we get to the end of our run of this show, I know I’ll miss doing it. There’s something about this story, getting to hear it every night has an impact on you – as it should. I’ll also miss working with all of these wonderful actors! These are the funniest people I’ve spent time with in recent memory. Since there are 27 of us, we are like one big crazy family backstage, in the dressing rooms and in the green room. We’re constantly looking for a kid’s vest that always seems to wander off. Every day. The kids are always joking with us and playing jokes on us. And it keeps everything interesting and fresh backstage. That camaraderie also informs our relationships in our performances. Everything helps everything.
I’ll see you at the theater! Maybe even this weekend – there are still tickets available for our final four shows! And if you feel so inclined, come on back to say hello to the cast after the show. You’re allowed - we’re all family.
Before I forget – I wanted to remind you that our next production at The Group Rep is The City. It’s a revival of a play that was written in 1909 but has been updated to modern times. It’s a play with murder, intrigue, scandal and politics. Stay tuned to this space to find out more…
[© MMIX MD TOTAL all rights reserved.]
Monday, December 14, 2009
From the Rehearsal Hall: OPENING NIGHT!
After weeks of rehearsing it all comes down to one night: Opening Night. Often opening day is spent trying to stay calm and conserving energy. I often pretend to take a nap. I know I’ll never actually get to sleep, but I always lie down and close my eyes anyway. Luckily for this production of A Christmas Carol, we had performances leading up to the actual opening, called previews. At first it’s just a few company members sitting in the house, getting us used to having an audience. It really helps – you get used to the flow of the show, and learn how demanding it will actually be. You also learn where people may laugh. There are always surprises in that department, you recognize jokes and expect laughs in those places, but you never know what an audience will find humorous. By the time we got to the night before opening, the house was completely sold out! And there were reporters and other members of the press seeing the show to review it. It’s great to get some of them there before opening night if at all possible, as it helps take some of the pressure off the opening. A part of you wishes they would wait a couple of weeks until the show is a well oiled machine, but their job is to help get the word out about the show. At the end of the day, you appreciate that they’re there at all.
Finally the big day arrived. We actually didn’t have the day off, we had rehearsal scheduled that afternoon. I was thrilled to do it because this show is a big production. Technically, it’s an extremely complicated. Plus, it has the added benefit of keeping you focused and not jittery at home. And you know what – the opening show was fantastic! We were all in a great mood from being excited and had been focused together all day. It was such a relief not only for it to go off without a hitch, but for it to happen at all! There were so many emotions attached to opening that you felt a huge weight had been lifted by the performance.
Once we got past that, we could finally settle into the run and do our jobs.
[© MMIX MD TOTAL all rights reserved]
Click here to go straight to the next installment.
Finally the big day arrived. We actually didn’t have the day off, we had rehearsal scheduled that afternoon. I was thrilled to do it because this show is a big production. Technically, it’s an extremely complicated. Plus, it has the added benefit of keeping you focused and not jittery at home. And you know what – the opening show was fantastic! We were all in a great mood from being excited and had been focused together all day. It was such a relief not only for it to go off without a hitch, but for it to happen at all! There were so many emotions attached to opening that you felt a huge weight had been lifted by the performance.
Once we got past that, we could finally settle into the run and do our jobs.
[© MMIX MD TOTAL all rights reserved]
Click here to go straight to the next installment.
Saturday, November 21, 2009
From Rehearsals [Getting Used to the Space]
Bumping your head. Falling on your face. Tripping over chairs. Running into walls. Making entrances too early. Tripping over people. Making entrances too late. Stumbling around in the dark and somehow ending up outside the theater. This is what it’s learn your way around a set that’s just been built.
All the while, you’re trying to remember your lines and blocking.
Finally being able to use the set is an exciting time in rehearsal. For one, it means that you’ve moved out of the rehearsal hall and into the theater. That in and of itself has it’s own difficulties. The rehearsal hall is a closed space where we can hear each other easily, especially when we’re singing. The theater is designed so that the sound flows out into the audience. Onstage it can often feel like you’re out there all alone. In a great way. Feeling that exposed requires you to listen with your entire being and that makes everything you do onstage much more alive. As does the throbbing pain that results from running into a wall. But hey – anything that makes the show a more visceral experience for the audience is a good thing, right?
In all seriousness, our set is beautiful and fun and is a testament to the talent of our scenic designer, Trefoni Rizzi. The kids are having a blast playing on it, as are (ahem) the adults.
Come see the show and you’ll see what I mean! A Christmas Carol is playing at The Group Rep. Tickets are available now.
Happy Holidays!
[© MMIX MD TOTAL all rights reserved]
click HERE to go to the next installment.
All the while, you’re trying to remember your lines and blocking.
Finally being able to use the set is an exciting time in rehearsal. For one, it means that you’ve moved out of the rehearsal hall and into the theater. That in and of itself has it’s own difficulties. The rehearsal hall is a closed space where we can hear each other easily, especially when we’re singing. The theater is designed so that the sound flows out into the audience. Onstage it can often feel like you’re out there all alone. In a great way. Feeling that exposed requires you to listen with your entire being and that makes everything you do onstage much more alive. As does the throbbing pain that results from running into a wall. But hey – anything that makes the show a more visceral experience for the audience is a good thing, right?
In all seriousness, our set is beautiful and fun and is a testament to the talent of our scenic designer, Trefoni Rizzi. The kids are having a blast playing on it, as are (ahem) the adults.
Come see the show and you’ll see what I mean! A Christmas Carol is playing at The Group Rep. Tickets are available now.
Happy Holidays!
[© MMIX MD TOTAL all rights reserved]
click HERE to go to the next installment.
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